boxofmisfits | Strange Droid

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Strange Droid

When the Stormtroopers returned to the Admonitor, they had a box with them, claiming that they got a good deal on it and thought the Grand Admiral might appreciate it. Opening up the box had revealed a droid, but not like any Thrawn had ever seen. While he'd seen droids within the Empire, none were quite this human looking. The lead Stormtrooper, Commander Balkin, said that he felt Thrawn might appreciate it as an art piece or collector's item. Balkin said that the seller hadn't known what world the droid came from, or what culture made it.

Thrawn accepted the droid and took it back to his office. The droid wasn't like any he'd ever seen before, even after cross-referencing various models dating back to the Clone Wars. He'd even looked at droid models from the Sith Empire and Old Republic, and it matched none there either. The strange synthetic skin was interesting, as Thrawn could see no real reason for it. Perhaps it had covered the unit's entire body once.

Thankfully, Thrawn had figured out which wires went where within the droid, and had found a way to hook it to a battery that would give it enough power until it could recharge itself. After some fiddling, Thrawn managed to boot the droid up.

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"They've been great, yeah."

He'd made friends. And allies. People who came to him if they needed help with tracking something they'd lost down. Most of the crew greeted him when they passed him. A few of them could probably even be called protective. A few of them had said that he reminded them of their grandfather which Nick chose to interpret as a compliment.

Either way he never lacked for people who wanted to talk to him when Thrawn was occupied. Both officers and Stormtroopers had a tendency to track him down when they were off duty to invite him to come sit with them. Or to ask if there was something he needed help with.

"Easier to hide in smaller numbers. Still a damn shame though."

For an entire people to dwindle like that. History and culture being lost but also lives.

"These Jedi were out to get them too then?"

Enemies both outside and within. Sounded messy and complicated.

"Yes. The Jedi were their sworn enemies, often at war with one another. For years, the Jedi thought that the Sith were extinct, not knowing that they were lying in wait. The Sith struck a few decades ago, orchestrating a war that led to the destruction of the Jedi."

There were rumors of Jedi within the galaxy the last time Thrawn had visited, but it hadn't been a priority for him. And then, of course, there were the Emperor's Hands, who identified as neither Jedi nor Sith.

"Lots of loss of life all around then."

It was unfortunate. People were given the gift of speech and still chose violence that ended in eradication. Nick wondered why it was so difficult for people to understand each other and compromise to minimize death. For most people life was so fleeting too.

"Damn shame," He repeated, rubbing at the back of his neck with his good hand.

"How about your people? Sort of can't help but notice that you're as outnumbered here as I am."

As the superior officer too. It had to be lonely. Nick could be invited by the crew on account of being an outsider, but when it came to people who got chummy with Thrawn, he supposed there was just him. Since Thrawn was his owner and allowed for him to speak his mind.

"Yes," Thrawn paused, as if lost in thought. "I was exiled by my people, the Chiss, many years ago, for breaking one of our laws. The Empire found me, and recruited me. I saw an opportunity, and I took it."

Even after all this time, the exile still pained him. He loved his people, he would do anything for them, even if they did not want his help. He would always love them, and everything he did, he did for them.

"I'm sorry to hear that, Thrawn," Nick said, reaching out with his good hand to give his arm a gentle squeeze. Nick couldn't remember where he came from exactly but he was pretty sure he could go back any time he liked. Being separated and exiled from one's people though. That would never stop hurting he imagined.

"Suppose your current situation ain't bad. It's not home though I imagine."

Probably nothing that could make it feel like home though. But he'd certainly made something of himself.

He pulled his hand back, since he doubted Thrawn wanted it to linger. Even his good hand lacked the warmth of the living after all.

Thrawn glanced at their joined hands. Nick's skin felt interesting. It wasn't quite rubber, nor did it feel like real skin. Thrawn's guess that it was silicone-based seemed to be accurate. Thrawn had still yet to figure out why someone would give a mechanical lifeform skin, or go out of their way to make him look human.

"While I often miss home, I have carved a place for myself. There are some Chiss who chose to join the Empire of the Hand, and are loyal to me, though most of them are stationed on various worlds."

He felt oddly self-conscious at that glance. During his time with Thrawn he had come to find that he was quite unique. Not quite a person. Not quite a droid. Something in between or perhaps entirely different. Still acutely aware that his hands weren't the hands of someone quite living. He had old memories that were his but not, newer ones that were fragmented, and new ones of his life here.

Maybe his identity was as much in tatters as his body. He thought that self-conscious feeling probably came from the fact that he didn't carry the heat and comfort of something living though. Or maybe it was just because he was an antique.

"That's good. That you're not all on your own."

Being unique was a good thing but it was also quite lonely. Or so Nick thought anyway.

"Are they out on their own missions for you?"

"They are where they need to be, even if that place is not on my ship." He hoped to integrate more Chiss officers into the fleet, since they already had aliens serving as stormtroopers. Some of the humans were still rather xenophobic, unfortunately, and it was another thing Thrawn hoped to weed out.

"You are particularly good at knowing where to send people," Nick commented. He didn't have too much of an eye on Thrawn's operations around the galaxy, but he had learned enough to know that he was an excellent tactician. People talked after all, when their missions weren't top secret.

Plus he suspected that they assumed his memory could be purged should he hear something that he shouldn't know. Nick wasn't sure if his memory could be and was perhaps a little worried that purging his memory would also purge his personality.

"Sign of a good leader, that."

Nick thought he had known at least one good leader before Thrawn too. Not the same type of leader, but one who knew how to connect with his people. He couldn't remember his name though. That detail was lost in the blackout of his memory after all that had happened.

"Thank you. A good leader must often do what is best for the mission or the crew, even if it goes against their personal desires."

Though, ironically, Palpatine sending him away to chart the Unknown Region had given Thrawn what he wanted. This way he could form his own united galaxy that protected and defended others, and protect the Ascendancy.

"Yeah, I knew a leader like that once. Not the same context, but I think I remember leadin' going against what he wanted for himself. He just happened to be good at it."

Still couldn't quite remember his name. Or his face. He remembered a red coat though and a cocky attitude.

"Can't say I envy the position even though I admire the ability to lead. I think I've usually chosen to fly solo."

He thought he might have had partners a few times, but those details were even fuzzier.

"Leadership is not an easy task, and often requires one to put their personal feelings aside, yes. However, the reward of seeing those under you succeed, or knowing that you are doing right by them, should be enough."

Sadly, too many officers within Palpatine's empire only saw leadership as a means of getting what they personally wanted, or merely as a way to rise within the ranks. He had advised the Emperor on what to do regarding the Endor base, and he unfortunately suspected that his concerns would be ignored.

"Yeah, it should be," Nick agreed, reaching to rub the back of his neck as he pondered on it.

There were plenty of leaders out there who had no business being leaders. While he could no longer put a face to them, he was pretty sure he'd come across people like that too in the past. People who'd get to a leadership position and turn into the king of the world. Or pull the ladder they themself had climbed up behind them to make sure no one could get to where they were.

"Rarely is though."

"Sadly, yes."

Thrawn could only hope that the Empire pulled itself together and soon, before they had worse things to worry about.

He turned to another painting, this one dating back to the Old Republic, possibly even Darth Revan's time, of a woman and a droid. The woman looked fondly at the droid, while the droid brought her tea.

"What do you think of this piece, Valentine?"

"She seems fond of her droid. Could just be my imagination, but it ain't the sort of fondness you'd feel for a reliable appliance or a servant."

Very few people would think to thank their toaster or look pleased about their stove turning on as expected. So he thought the woman depicted in the painting probably saw that droid as perhaps a family member. Or at least a friend.

"Not that I have your ability to read art though so I might just be seein' what I want to see."

Wishful thinking that he could be something more to someone, perhaps. Friendship that bordered on being family.

"An astute observation." Thrawn was nothing but sincere in his statement, liking that Valentine was willing to speak his mind and come to the conclusion that he did.

"The painting was commissioned by a woman who had been widowed, and turned to her droid for comfort. She saw the droid as something of a replacement for her husband, in matters of companionship and possibly conversation. The droid is looking at her with affection in return, though it may have been a request by the widow."

Thrawn wasn't sure how sentient droids like that were back when that painting was made. Perhaps the two were close companions, or perhaps the woman had an unhealthy fixation on what a non-sentient being.

"Replacement, huh. That doesn't sound healthy. Not like the droid could say no even if it had wanted to."

That was a big difference, he'd found, between himself and other droids. They couldn't say no to their owners at all. While he was always able to speak his mind. While plenty of people were friendly with their droids and while he too had made many friends, a lot of them didn't expect a droid to outright refuse orders or requests.

A few people had been surprised that he himself had told them no on multiple occasions. Though they had stopped seeing him as a serving droid by now.

"I get loneliness, but that ain't necessarily the way to go about it."

Seeking companionship from someone new would probably be better. But he supposed the droid had just been easier to access if it had already been in the home. If it knew her husband too and could emulate his behaviors.

"Loneliness can often make one attach themselves to persons or things in an unhealthy way, yes."

He'd seen officers who became lonely during long tours, away from loved ones, and it would sometimes lead to them crossing boundaries. Thrawn had even suspected one officer had outright had an affair to alleviate his loneliness, and had never spoken of it aloud or told his wife.

"Still, if one was willing and able to give consent, then friendship or any other strong bond with a mechanical being wouldn't be inappropriate."

"Loneliness can lead you down a lot of dark roads, I think."

Unhealthy attachments. Substance abuse. Different sorts of addiction. People weren't meant to manage all on their lonesome. Not in the long run. He wondered if the woman only had the droid left with no other friends or family left to lean on after the death of her husband. Even so, leaning on a droid for companionship and no one else was unhealthy. Not just for her, but probably for the droid too.

Nick had gotten to know enough that he knew that they were as much people as any organic being. Of course they weren't considered as such.

He wasn't really, either. Not by anyone besides Thrawn and the people aboard his ship he'd gotten to know, anyway. And jury was still out on some of them whether they considered him a person or just as a droid with a particularly fun programmed personality.

"It wouldn't be, no," He agreed, with a slight smile. He thought of Thrawn as his friend after all. And hoped the man felt similarly about him even though he was quite difficult to get a read on, "Love would probably be complicated, if only because most people would find it off-putting."

Romantic love would be, anyway.

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Strange Droid

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